Today has made me start my thoughts about living the life you are given to the fullest potential it has. This morning I got a phone call that an old friend of mine, and my best friends ex-boyfriend, had passed away. We were never really close, but we were friends, and this was shocking news to me. It is upsetting to know that someone of such a young age has passed on already, he was only 20, he didn't even live his life.
But then I thought about it again. He did live his life. The life God had planned for him since day one. The irony of this is that my friend still had feelings for him, and he still loved her as well. It was that love hate kind of relationship, but they both knew that they eventually belonged together and should have been together for the rest of their lives. My friend called me upset because the last thing that she wrote to him was about how he needed to clean up his act and be there for his pregnant girlfriend. Now he's gone, and will never see his child. But God had it destined for this to happen, it has been planned since he was put on this earth. My friend was upset because she thought that the last feelings he had towards her were hate. But that is not the truth. He took her words to heart, and listened to her opinions and took her advice. Obviously she meant a lot to him, or he would have blown off everything she had said to him. I'm glad she let him know how she feels, and even though each person's destiny is carved out for them already, you can still tell them what you are feeling each and every day.
Never lie about your feelings to someone you care about, always make sure they know the truth. Because tomorrow, they may be gone, and you will never get the chance to tell them how you feel. If you love someone, make sure to tell them each and everyday, because it may be too late the next time you plan on talking to them. Don't ever fret on the last things that you say to someone, because if you make sure that they know you love them as often as you can, THOSE are the memorable words they will know from you. The impression you made the whole journey with the person is the one that will matter to them, and the one they will remember in eternity. Not that you were brutally honest with them the last time you talked to them.
Life is way too short. Someone you love could be gone tomorrow, and you may not have said everything you wanted to them. Call them up, right now. Tell them how you're feeling, and let them know that you love them. The impression you leave the rest of the time is going to be a lot greater of an impact than the last words you say. Life is too short to have all the hatred in the world. Think of someone you hate for no reason, you just want to hate them. Get ahold of them, apologize, and try and make nice. You never know what someone else is going through. And they could be gone tomorrow, and you'll find out that they had been having some tough times, and you'll feel sorry that you didn't befriend them.
Just take your lives into perspective. And please, DON'T DO DRUGS. I love you all, and I want you all with me for a LONG time. Even though I don't know what God has in-store for the future, I want you all to know that I love you, and there are only a few people that I hate. And there are very explainable and good reasons behind the hatred. Make a new friend today, because you never know that stepping into someone's life could change it forever. Tell someone you care. Make sure everyone knows the way you feel about them, even if it is something that needs to be worked on. I love you guys. Stay safe<3
RIP Brandon Degler.
1/7/88-3/11/08
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Thursday, January 3, 2008
2007 is at an end...
I'm sorry I never updated while I was in Boston, but I will have all sorts of reviews and pictures up for you coming soon. This blog is about 2007. The end of the year has come, and what have we all accomplished? So many things have happened this year, and I have so many people to thank for making 2007 one of the greatest years so far. I guess we will start from the beginning.
I brought in the year 2007 the same way I bring in every year, sitting at home, watching the Disney channel special, and waiting for the ball to drop in Times Square. I wasn't worried about the things to come, or all the changes that would be occuring in my life this year. Little did I know, a lot would be changing. The first few months of this year, I was in and out of the hospital, getting tons of tests done, and waiting to hear what was wrong with me. All of you were there for me, even on my birthday while I was sitting in the hospital waiting for more test results. After that was all said and done, the year got better. I met some amazing new bands, and amazing new people. But, I still hadn't seen the Jonas Brothers since December, and that upset me. March rolled around, and I was finally able to make it to a show, because I didn't have a prior commitment, so Danielle and I roadtripped up to Clifton Park, partied in the hotel lobby with some amazing new friends, and waited outside from 2am in the freezing cold. That was the day I knew everything was changing. It had all progressed so there went from being 100-150 people at a mall show in December, to there being over 700 at a mall show in March. I was upset, I was sick, and one person I knew I could count on to cheer me up, did, or tried to, with everything he had. I would give a lot just to go back to when he would do that for me. The next few months of the year, nothing extremely amazing happened. In May, I was able to start seeing Click again, with a new member. I knew he was drop dead gorgeous, and I knew I had to like him better that I liked the drop-out at the time, but I didn't know kpat and the whole new sound would become another obsession. I had missed them a ton, and was finally glad to see them over a year and a half after the last time we had parted ways. So I went to a few more Click shows over the next few months, and then to a ton more Jonas shows, I didn't care how everything was becoming. There was the shows in Lodi and Hershey, and Westbury andPhilly, and the CD release shows. They were some exciting times, but I was starting to change. My "best friends" all just deserted me. We didn't talk, we didn't see each other, we didn't do anything. It was hard to have everyone there for you one minute, and the next, nobody is by your side, helping you to stand up when you fall. I started to notice changes in people, and I didn't know what to think of it. I spent my time in the last few months with my family, and what few friends I had that still talked to me. It seems as if everyone was going through something similar. Most of us are striking up conversations with each other again, and even making plans to hang out, but we were all at a low point. We realized that things were never going to be the same, and we didn't know what to do about it. We decided to let it blow over, and maybe complain a little here and there, but we knew that we couldn't change any of it. Within a matter of 7 months, things totally blew up in our faces. All the hard work we put in. All the time and dedication, went down the drain with thousands of screaming twelve year olds. I didn't know what 2007 would hold, but I sure didn't think it would become the year of the Jonas. That it did. I am so proud of everything these boys have accomplished. They deserve everything they have and so much more. Except, we have all realized that they need to take a break. This whole non-stop touring, no sleeping, always performing thing, doesn't seem too healthy, and the last few months of this year, I have been worried to death for these boys. We know that no matter how much has changed for them this year, and how much they have changed as a person, isn't going to stop us from being there for them until the very end. 2007 was just the beginning for them, and now we have 2008 to look forward to. In November, I spent time with my friends and family, went into the city with one of my best friends, and just had some time to relax. Then in December, I was going non-stop. I had to get everything ready for my trip, and find time to get over being sick. I met a ton of AMAZING new people, and spent precious time with some amazing older friends. Then I went to Boston for two weeks. Went to see Jonas and Hannah/Miley, saw Mitchel, went to Jingle Jam, and met Drew, who I have been waiting to meet for ages, and even started talking to people again that had backstabbed me and I forgave them. A new year, another chance. I spent time with my friends family, and they were nothing but nice and generous to me. And that brings us to New Years Eve, where I did the same thing I normally do. I sat there, watching the tv specials, waiting for the ball to drop. But this year, it was different. Three boys that I know and love were the ones on the tv rocking us into the new year. The twelve months of 2007 have gone by so fast. I still can't comprehend some things that went on this year. It takes such a short amount of time for everything to change. And 2007 was such a great year that I hope 2008 is even better. New tv shows, new movies, new CD's, new tours, new friends, new experiences. So here is to you 2007, you will always be one of the best years in my book. I love each and every one of you, and I'm sure to make a ton of new friends this year, but you guys are the best, and I don't know what I would have ever done without you in 2007. I love you.
Watch out 2008, here we come....
Sorry, I had to get it written, and it is not as detailed and good as I had planned on making it, but it is something. I hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday break!
Reviews from the past few shows and stuff will be up soon =]
xo,
francesemily.
I brought in the year 2007 the same way I bring in every year, sitting at home, watching the Disney channel special, and waiting for the ball to drop in Times Square. I wasn't worried about the things to come, or all the changes that would be occuring in my life this year. Little did I know, a lot would be changing. The first few months of this year, I was in and out of the hospital, getting tons of tests done, and waiting to hear what was wrong with me. All of you were there for me, even on my birthday while I was sitting in the hospital waiting for more test results. After that was all said and done, the year got better. I met some amazing new bands, and amazing new people. But, I still hadn't seen the Jonas Brothers since December, and that upset me. March rolled around, and I was finally able to make it to a show, because I didn't have a prior commitment, so Danielle and I roadtripped up to Clifton Park, partied in the hotel lobby with some amazing new friends, and waited outside from 2am in the freezing cold. That was the day I knew everything was changing. It had all progressed so there went from being 100-150 people at a mall show in December, to there being over 700 at a mall show in March. I was upset, I was sick, and one person I knew I could count on to cheer me up, did, or tried to, with everything he had. I would give a lot just to go back to when he would do that for me. The next few months of the year, nothing extremely amazing happened. In May, I was able to start seeing Click again, with a new member. I knew he was drop dead gorgeous, and I knew I had to like him better that I liked the drop-out at the time, but I didn't know kpat and the whole new sound would become another obsession. I had missed them a ton, and was finally glad to see them over a year and a half after the last time we had parted ways. So I went to a few more Click shows over the next few months, and then to a ton more Jonas shows, I didn't care how everything was becoming. There was the shows in Lodi and Hershey, and Westbury andPhilly, and the CD release shows. They were some exciting times, but I was starting to change. My "best friends" all just deserted me. We didn't talk, we didn't see each other, we didn't do anything. It was hard to have everyone there for you one minute, and the next, nobody is by your side, helping you to stand up when you fall. I started to notice changes in people, and I didn't know what to think of it. I spent my time in the last few months with my family, and what few friends I had that still talked to me. It seems as if everyone was going through something similar. Most of us are striking up conversations with each other again, and even making plans to hang out, but we were all at a low point. We realized that things were never going to be the same, and we didn't know what to do about it. We decided to let it blow over, and maybe complain a little here and there, but we knew that we couldn't change any of it. Within a matter of 7 months, things totally blew up in our faces. All the hard work we put in. All the time and dedication, went down the drain with thousands of screaming twelve year olds. I didn't know what 2007 would hold, but I sure didn't think it would become the year of the Jonas. That it did. I am so proud of everything these boys have accomplished. They deserve everything they have and so much more. Except, we have all realized that they need to take a break. This whole non-stop touring, no sleeping, always performing thing, doesn't seem too healthy, and the last few months of this year, I have been worried to death for these boys. We know that no matter how much has changed for them this year, and how much they have changed as a person, isn't going to stop us from being there for them until the very end. 2007 was just the beginning for them, and now we have 2008 to look forward to. In November, I spent time with my friends and family, went into the city with one of my best friends, and just had some time to relax. Then in December, I was going non-stop. I had to get everything ready for my trip, and find time to get over being sick. I met a ton of AMAZING new people, and spent precious time with some amazing older friends. Then I went to Boston for two weeks. Went to see Jonas and Hannah/Miley, saw Mitchel, went to Jingle Jam, and met Drew, who I have been waiting to meet for ages, and even started talking to people again that had backstabbed me and I forgave them. A new year, another chance. I spent time with my friends family, and they were nothing but nice and generous to me. And that brings us to New Years Eve, where I did the same thing I normally do. I sat there, watching the tv specials, waiting for the ball to drop. But this year, it was different. Three boys that I know and love were the ones on the tv rocking us into the new year. The twelve months of 2007 have gone by so fast. I still can't comprehend some things that went on this year. It takes such a short amount of time for everything to change. And 2007 was such a great year that I hope 2008 is even better. New tv shows, new movies, new CD's, new tours, new friends, new experiences. So here is to you 2007, you will always be one of the best years in my book. I love each and every one of you, and I'm sure to make a ton of new friends this year, but you guys are the best, and I don't know what I would have ever done without you in 2007. I love you.
Watch out 2008, here we come....
Sorry, I had to get it written, and it is not as detailed and good as I had planned on making it, but it is something. I hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday break!
Reviews from the past few shows and stuff will be up soon =]
xo,
francesemily.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
What have I been doing lately?
I haven't posted a blog in about a month. There are some things that I wanted to post about, to see everyone's opinions, but I never got to it. I have been super busy trying to catch up on my schoolwork, and get everything ready for my trip. I haven't been feeling too swell either. My journey begins in only six short days. Really, it begins in three short days, when I finally get to meet an amazing actor, and rapper. I'm hoping to get to go both Friday and Saturday, but, I'm not so sure what is going to work out right now. If I am not able to make it on Friday night, I will definetly be there on Saturday, and I look forward to seeing you there. =]
On Monday, I have to finish packing all my stuff, and be at the airport at 6:30 pm. It is sad, because I have yet to miss seeing the boys when they are in Philadelphia. But I have to, because they cancelled the signing, so it is now performance only, and then I will have about three hours to blow before I have to be at the airport. There is no fun in that. I am upset, but it's just something I needed to do. After I board that plane on Monday, I am starting two weeks of nonstop fun. Sure, it is going to be a bit awkward spending Christmas with another family, and not being here for mine. That is what the holidays are all about. Family. Well, I am going to be with my friend and her family. And they are like family to me, they are taking me in for two weeks. Two weeks of nonstop partying, concerts, autograph signings, in-stores, friends, and fun. It is going to be good to get away from home for a little while. I get to see some of my best friends. The ones that are still here for me through everything, even though we are so far apart. And I get to meet some amazing new people. And I'm sure I will be making a ton of new friends on this journey. Hopefully everything will be worthwhile, and what God wants to be accomplished, will be what happens on this trip. I love you guys, and I hope you are having a happy and safe holiday season!
I will probably be posting some blogs on my trip, just so you guys can keep up with me.
Don't forget, I will no longer be posting blogs on myspace, bebo, or facebook. This is the only page I will be blogging on, so if you want to know what I am up to at any certain time, just come visit this page =]
Peace and Love,
francesemily.
On Monday, I have to finish packing all my stuff, and be at the airport at 6:30 pm. It is sad, because I have yet to miss seeing the boys when they are in Philadelphia. But I have to, because they cancelled the signing, so it is now performance only, and then I will have about three hours to blow before I have to be at the airport. There is no fun in that. I am upset, but it's just something I needed to do. After I board that plane on Monday, I am starting two weeks of nonstop fun. Sure, it is going to be a bit awkward spending Christmas with another family, and not being here for mine. That is what the holidays are all about. Family. Well, I am going to be with my friend and her family. And they are like family to me, they are taking me in for two weeks. Two weeks of nonstop partying, concerts, autograph signings, in-stores, friends, and fun. It is going to be good to get away from home for a little while. I get to see some of my best friends. The ones that are still here for me through everything, even though we are so far apart. And I get to meet some amazing new people. And I'm sure I will be making a ton of new friends on this journey. Hopefully everything will be worthwhile, and what God wants to be accomplished, will be what happens on this trip. I love you guys, and I hope you are having a happy and safe holiday season!
I will probably be posting some blogs on my trip, just so you guys can keep up with me.
Don't forget, I will no longer be posting blogs on myspace, bebo, or facebook. This is the only page I will be blogging on, so if you want to know what I am up to at any certain time, just come visit this page =]
Peace and Love,
francesemily.
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
What's in a name?
I really couldn't come up with a name for this entry. What does a name mean? It tells you what the whole thing is about, before you even get the chance to read it. Why name these blogs? Why not just make you sit here and read them out. That's the whole point.
Life hasn't been going as I had hoped it would be during the beautiful month of November. We are only six days in, and I already feel stressed and ready to freak out on people. Some things leave me questioning every motive. What is the purpose for everything I am doing? Does everything have to have a purpose, or is it just supposed to serve as a timeline of things I have done in my life? This month I am going up to the city, only once sadly, but happy to say that I get to spend time with one of the most amazing friends ever. Its going to be one heck of a p-a-r-t-y partay, in quote from her mother.
So there are many things on my mind that I feel the need to blog about right now, but we are going to try and keep it to one topic a post. Today I watched some videos that were posted from an in-studio, and in-bus type thing that happened in the past week, and let me just say, genuine happiness. I felt like I could put a smile on my face and let my heart feel okay, because they are happy. Right now, people have been saying things about the way the boys are looking and acting. I really do get tired of hearing all this stuff, and it is truly breaking my heart. Sure, we make fun of their clothes in a "wow that was funny" kind of way, but we don't go criticizing why they are wearing what they are wearing. If you were wearing something that someone thought made you look overly slutty, would you like them calling you a slut for it? Just because the boys enjoy wearing skinny jeans and shawls, gives nobody the right to call them gay. We all have our little jokes, but in all reality, saying things like that seriously can hurt. Don't say that they are being forced to dress like this, and that they are being forced to act as "metrosexuals" when they dont really want to. If you are going to call them a metrosexual, then y ou really can't call them gay, that totally defeats thje purpose of being metrosexual, and turns it into being homosexual. They are going to dress the way they want to dress, and that is the end of it. Don't be judgemental of the clothes that are worn, by anyone. Before I judge you by the outfits you wear, and start to make up rumors about you, because of what you wear. If you don't like the boys music or the way they dress, thats fine. Don't be so critical, as there are some people that quite franktly enjoy every single bit of it. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but saying things like that, and meaning them seriously, isn't right. Have respect. And as I said, everyone is entitled to your own opinion, so you can say you don't like the music, and you can say you don't like the clothes, but don't EVER say that you hate the boys. In all reality, most of you have no idea what the boys are like, most of you ahve never even met them. After you meet them and get to know them, then you can say that you hate them, but after you do, you won't ever say that. They are three of the sweetest boys ever, and I don't understand how people can bash on them so easily, when they don't even know them. Don't be a fan for a few months, then just randomly start bashing them and say you don't care. If you don't care, and you don't like them, why are they still on your mind? Who knows, it's baffling.
I find myself wondering that sometimes. "Why can't I get them off of my mind?" " Why can't I just let go?"
God works in mysterious ways.
And for that I am thankful.
Now that I was so rudely interrupted by one of my brother's halo buddies, and his sister getting on the phone telling him to "get off so she can call matt" I really don't have anymore to say.
Thanks for reading.
Sure to be another one soon.
Life hasn't been going as I had hoped it would be during the beautiful month of November. We are only six days in, and I already feel stressed and ready to freak out on people. Some things leave me questioning every motive. What is the purpose for everything I am doing? Does everything have to have a purpose, or is it just supposed to serve as a timeline of things I have done in my life? This month I am going up to the city, only once sadly, but happy to say that I get to spend time with one of the most amazing friends ever. Its going to be one heck of a p-a-r-t-y partay, in quote from her mother.
So there are many things on my mind that I feel the need to blog about right now, but we are going to try and keep it to one topic a post. Today I watched some videos that were posted from an in-studio, and in-bus type thing that happened in the past week, and let me just say, genuine happiness. I felt like I could put a smile on my face and let my heart feel okay, because they are happy. Right now, people have been saying things about the way the boys are looking and acting. I really do get tired of hearing all this stuff, and it is truly breaking my heart. Sure, we make fun of their clothes in a "wow that was funny" kind of way, but we don't go criticizing why they are wearing what they are wearing. If you were wearing something that someone thought made you look overly slutty, would you like them calling you a slut for it? Just because the boys enjoy wearing skinny jeans and shawls, gives nobody the right to call them gay. We all have our little jokes, but in all reality, saying things like that seriously can hurt. Don't say that they are being forced to dress like this, and that they are being forced to act as "metrosexuals" when they dont really want to. If you are going to call them a metrosexual, then y ou really can't call them gay, that totally defeats thje purpose of being metrosexual, and turns it into being homosexual. They are going to dress the way they want to dress, and that is the end of it. Don't be judgemental of the clothes that are worn, by anyone. Before I judge you by the outfits you wear, and start to make up rumors about you, because of what you wear. If you don't like the boys music or the way they dress, thats fine. Don't be so critical, as there are some people that quite franktly enjoy every single bit of it. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but saying things like that, and meaning them seriously, isn't right. Have respect. And as I said, everyone is entitled to your own opinion, so you can say you don't like the music, and you can say you don't like the clothes, but don't EVER say that you hate the boys. In all reality, most of you have no idea what the boys are like, most of you ahve never even met them. After you meet them and get to know them, then you can say that you hate them, but after you do, you won't ever say that. They are three of the sweetest boys ever, and I don't understand how people can bash on them so easily, when they don't even know them. Don't be a fan for a few months, then just randomly start bashing them and say you don't care. If you don't care, and you don't like them, why are they still on your mind? Who knows, it's baffling.
I find myself wondering that sometimes. "Why can't I get them off of my mind?" " Why can't I just let go?"
God works in mysterious ways.
And for that I am thankful.
Now that I was so rudely interrupted by one of my brother's halo buddies, and his sister getting on the phone telling him to "get off so she can call matt" I really don't have anymore to say.
Thanks for reading.
Sure to be another one soon.
Monday, November 5, 2007
What does it mean?
As I'm sitting here doing schoolwork, and chatting with some good friends, and some new friends, I begin to think about the same thing I have pondered a good amount of time every so often. What does the term "best friend" mean in my life? People have been coming into and leaving my life for as long as I remember, but I have been thinking about how all the people that supposedly cared so much about me, have just completely forgotten that I exist. I guess all this pondering on the topic started last year at one of the local fairs. I was seeing everyone and even wondering when they were going to say hi, and come give me a hug and tell me that they missed me. No such luck. It seemed as thought they had all moved on from remembering my perturbed existence. I had fun with the friends that I had stayed close with since I had left that school, but I was still hoping that I would go home, get online and see some messages from some of the people I had run into that night saying, "Oh, I saw you tonight!" or "Why didn't you say hi to me tonight?!" But again, no such luck. Why had I once called these people that had once cared so much about me my best friends. Why couldn't I tell that once I was gone and out of their life I would be eternally forgotten. We all promised to stay in contact, and talk whenever we could, but now I'm not even recognized by the people I once felt so close with. I can walk around that town at a parade on the street for so many hours, and see so many familiar faces that I have so many great memories with, and I just have to walk past them, and flash them a smile, leaving them wondering who I was. People grow up, right? We all make new friends, and we all move on with our lives. But why does it hurt so much to feel that you have been forgotten by people that cried the day you left, and said that we would always hang out and do all this stuff. In the beginning I was at all the parties, going to all the school's events, and now, I'm worried that even the friendships I still have with some amazing people won't last as long as we would have liked. Some of us have remained close, but mostly by a thread. I miss youg uys, and the time I spent with you was some of the best times of my life. I won't ever forget it. I am so thankful for all the friends I do get to spend time with, and who actually still take the time to ask me what is wrong when I'm having a bad day. Or take the time to call me just to see how I am doing. There are some people that I have spent a good amount of time with, and began to call you my best friends. Why do I let the term "best friend" come so loosely off of my tongue? After that short amount of time, we pretty much just stopped talking. No more random phone calls, no more spanding time together, making fun of each other for the dumbest reasons, but most of all, no more us. I don't take the term "best friend" so loosely anymore. If you are one of my best friends, you know it. Even though a lot of you that I consider my "bffs" don't get to see me or hang out with me too often, we still ahve the most amazing time ever. And I know that whenever I need someone to talk to you girls will always be here for me. I love our random texting, phone calls, and internet conversations. And the only reason that we have come to know each other was because of the Jonas Brothers. We quickly got to know each other, and figured out that we have way too much in common, but if it weren't for the boys, we would have never met. I really love you girls with all my heart, and I want you to know that I am always going to be here for you, and will always cherish all the time we've spent together. No matter what we're doing; rocking out at a concert, throwing a party, or just goofing off, we always have the most amazing time, just because we are best friends. God pushes and pulls people out of our lives for a reason. Although I am sad to have lost all my previous "best friends", I am glad that He showed me the path to you guys.
Just Getting Into This
I have been having the urge to blog a lot lately. Rather than post all of my ramblings on myspace, I found it essential that I make my own blogspot. This thing can get pretty interesting, but it will let you all know where I stand in life, everyday. This seems a bit like the old site, called xanga, but I will again try and write in here when I have the greater urge to let all of you know what is going on in my head.
This was just my first post, becasue I wanted to let everyone know why I made this, rather than just posting all my blogs on myspace. When I post a blog on myspace, I feel as if all the people I don't want to be reading it, are reading my blogs, and leaving me feedback. This way, everyone can read my blogs, and I don't have to worry about getting frustrated with people. In all seriousness, these blogs will be for everyone to read, and rather than attract so many people to my myspace page, becasue we all know how much I hate having random people add me, you can all just pass the blog links around and do what you want.
But enough of this for now.
There will be another blog posted in a little while.
Keep your eyes peeled.
This was just my first post, becasue I wanted to let everyone know why I made this, rather than just posting all my blogs on myspace. When I post a blog on myspace, I feel as if all the people I don't want to be reading it, are reading my blogs, and leaving me feedback. This way, everyone can read my blogs, and I don't have to worry about getting frustrated with people. In all seriousness, these blogs will be for everyone to read, and rather than attract so many people to my myspace page, becasue we all know how much I hate having random people add me, you can all just pass the blog links around and do what you want.
But enough of this for now.
There will be another blog posted in a little while.
Keep your eyes peeled.
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